What is perfect anyways?

Dave and I have been married for something to the tune of 8 months, and we have been together for just over 4 years. Obviously I am not anywhere near far enough into my marriage to give my advice or opinions, but...I do anyways...

It seems that lately there have been lots of relationship troubles all around me. Anything from constant bickering to money problems to really immature behavior. At first I found myself wondering when this will happen to Dave and I, when will we be tested, when will we have to fight for each other. Then I realized...that is exactly it, we fight FOR each other instead of with each other. We are tested daily as a couple, with long work hours, demanding jobs, a bad economy,and numerous other issues. If we did not fight for each other we would have lost each other a long time ago. When we disagree we say it right then, we tell each other if we are angry...and we get over it. My sister and I often talk about these things, she has a wonderful marriage and we really never talk about "what's wrong" buth rather, how we habdle things in our marriage's. We both feel strongly about not holding on to anger, and to not bring up past issues during an argument, don't hold grudges against the one you love!

Anyways, everything I am thinking can be summed up pretty easily...go, hold on to the one you love and fight FOR each other.

I see!

Please welcome the newest addition to my life...

Yes folks thats right...I now wear glasses...yippee. BUT hopefully they will help my headaches (like the massive migrane I had all day) and keep me from straining my eyes. I know the pic is black and white...but it was all I had on my computer, so just imagine them in blue....

Uncharacteristic.

I am generally a "puppies and rainbows" kind of girl. While I have a good grip on reality, I also like to be postive and focus on the good. That said, I usually do not get excited about things until it is pretty much a sure thing thus limiting my chances for dissapointment. I do not focus on the negative, I just try to iove my day to day and get excited (REALLY excited) when it is called for.

This month I thought I was pregnant. REALLY, thought I was pregnant, I was 8 days late and while I was pretty scared at the thought of being pregnant right now...I quickly became very excited at the prospect of it. I found my mind wandering off to nurseries and onesies...I was pricing out cloth diapers and breast pumps. And I hadn't even taken a test. Then I did, and I was SURE it would be positive, I was almost confused when it was negative. Then, just like that I started and my dreams of pacifiers and cribs were replaced with Tampax and a headache. I am quite sure that my husband was relieved as we were not trying quite yet, however I was inexplicably dissapointed. I felt like I had lost something, even though it was something I never had!


This has made me think quite a bit about the many women who suffer from infertility...to want something so bad, and month after month feel so dissapointed...I cannot even begin to imagine how hard that is.

So...I am not pregnant...just bloated. Fun.

Not me.

I love my life, my husband, my family, my pup....all of it. But I also absolutely love thoughts of the future. Of growing a big round belly while I grow our baby, thoughts of painting a nursery...bring a baby home. I smile when I think of Dave and I raising our children, being frustrated by their own little attitudes, and watching them grow. I look forward to family vacations and roadtrips, camping and disney. Some people dream of a hiugh power career, or traveling the world. Not me. I dream of being a mom, of changing diapers and making my own babyfood, of cloth diapering and babywearing! Someday, when the time is right, God willing my dreams will come true.